another TT under the belt

you probably don't know this about me but i hate physical testing. any kind of skill testing freaks me out. i did fine in school - made it through grade school, middle school, high school and college just fine except when it came to actual physical testing - PE, sports, A&M soccer - they all came with some sort of base testing to then be followed by more testing months later to re-evaluate that crappy showing you made only to be followed up again and again and again...the circle of shame and depression never end, the slap of poor performance stings as it sweeps across your face and you feel like you can't show your face because you suck so bad. after college soccer ended, i rejoiced in the simple fact that i would never again have to put myself through the torture...then i met Gurujan and he forced me to test. i had made it through my first TNT season not having done any base testing - conveniently skipping each of those sessions. coach made me test and i miraculously didn't hate it. i did really well but i also had a season to work up to my "base level" and i felt pretty good about it. the circle wasn't so shameful and depressing even when he made me test again and again. then knee surgery hit and i was out for a year and the skill testing stopped for what i thought might be forever - so wrong.

now i have been faced with the base testing concept again but this time it really is base. i mean down in the dumps, slow as molasses, a snail could possibly have passed me on any one of these TT. the things i put myself through. CB finally called me out yesterday when i sheepishly admitted i hadn't done my swim TT, the death stroke, the bane of my triathlon experience, the dreaded and not so pretty swim. in the end, he told me to stop complaining and just get it over with so. i. did...

i get to the Coronado pool - the only pool i can truly say i enjoy swimming in, especially at 6AMish as the sun rises and i get to experience the canvas God repaints every morning just for me, or so i tell myself :) alas, it was 6PM so none of that painting was on the horizon, just lanes of choppy water and bobbling heads. it seems as though the entire marine corp comes to swim at 6PM on Monday evenings along with the master's swim program. the pool was chalk full of warm bodies. i was overwhelmed. overwhelmed to think that all of these scantily clad, national security weapons were about to see me flail around in their lanes for a 10X100 TT, where i had 10 seconds to stop and rest. in reality i had 10 seconds to stop, try to see through my very foggy goggles, take my sopping wet hand up out of the water, grab my marker, try to write on the now sopping wet pad of paper that i brought to record the masquerade only to start it all over again. the guy beside commented "wow, now that's serious" and chuckled as he skimmed back over the surface for his next lap leaving me huffing and puffing, arms aching as if they might fall off, pride and humility duking it out at the end of the lane, and the thought "i'd drown you right now sir if i had the strength, or at least hold you under for a few seconds!"

in the end, i finished. i thought of CB a lot, and not anything good. thoughts like, "when i finally meet you i am going to sock you in the stomach for making me do this." now that i've had a night to sleep on it, i feel pretty good about the whole experience. i have now gone way out of my comfort zone on two occasions in the past couple of days, by myself. and although the numbers are pretty shoddy and a little inaccurate (i mean its hard to get the timing down when your actually trying to do the time), i'm glad i did it and i don't despise my new coach as much as i thought i did in the midst of my athletic excursion in the sea, or pool if you want to get technical. at least i got some race simulation - i got get kicked in the chest once and then kicked in the stomach twice by some guy who wasn't even in my lane! i did a 100m warm up, followed by the TT and then immediately left the lane, no cool down, no "hey thanks for sharing the lane", no nothing...touched the side, stopped my watch and literally jumped out of the water and high tailed it to the locker room.

on a high note - i was able to re-call all of my splits on my TIMEX so the whole writing on soppy paper wasn't necessary, but i wasn't sure i could figure the damn thing out, so i did it just-in-case. i finally sent all 3 TT results on and now i want to forget them...that is until next time - when i. blow. them. out. of. the. water...